Love Equals Respect

Do you Love your spouse? Do you respect them? These two concepts go hand and hand. You must respect to love.

Ephesians 5:33

New International Version (NIV)

33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

How do you show your Spouse respect ?

In the article “How to Show your Husband True Respect” by Shannon Nee we learn ways we can ensure that we are respecting our spouse

Here is a review of what S. Nee states is fundamental in respecting your spouse:

1-  Complimenting our spouse’s work

2-  Appreciate their humor

3-  Share their thoughts

4-  Let them be themselves

5-  Use good timing

6-  Be Nice in public

7-  Distance the kids

I feel that this list is very accurate. Have you ever noticed a couple in a store arguing with one another or belittling one another? It is a red flag that the couple is experiencing problems in their relationship. Our spouse always want to feel that they are number one in our life. When we listen and validate  them we are showing them that we respect what they say and do. Your spouse has to battle the world on a daily basis. Give them somewhere that they can take refugee.  Your children will always show your spouse respect if you do. Teaching your child how to respect their mother or father starts at home. 

The underlining approach to respect is to treat your spouse in a manner that you would want to be treated.

Give them attention, don’t try to make them change who they are, hold your spouse above others, find a way to communicate without harsh words or tones, and allow your children to see you communicate in a healthy manner.

Wives remember that your Husband has a different communication style than you. He is not going to describe and elaborate. He doesn’t need long drawn out poems to know that you Love him. He does need respect and with your actions he will know that he is loved.

Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

No Matter What Is Popular,Do What Is Right !

The Bible is our guideline to life. God’s word is to be lived and obeyed. In the modern world some may question the validity of the Bible but Faith is believing without seeing. We should have Faith in God without questioning his teachings.

 John 8:7: "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." but also Acts 3:19 "Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.

The key word is REPENT- feel or express sincere regret or remorse about one's wrongdoing or sin.When we Repent we should stop that behavior or action that is a Sin. A sin is something we have to ACT upon. Anyone can be a sinner. Anyone can start a bad or ungodly behavior. We as humans have the free will to do OR Not do. That is the difference God gave us from the Angels.

God wanted to give us an opportunity to serve and worship him freely.

No matter what your sin for all are the same in God's eyes. I am not pinpointing one Sin for I want the importance to be that all SIN IS SIN.  The importance is that you 1- Ask God to forgive you and 2- Change your ways. For if you continue in Sin you are not seeking forgiveness.

If you are making an active CHOICE in any behavior that is against God’s will then my friend you are Sinning and should ask for repentance.

Will changing be easy? Will those sinful desires go away? No- for we are made of flesh and flesh wants of the world. However, with active prayer and seeking of God can we diminish those desires. I have heard drug addicts state that they had quit X drug for Y amount of time and they still have times that they craved that drug. Keep your relationship with God fresh and he will guide you to continue fighting fleshly desires. 

It is well known that the Christian stance is most often the unpopular stance on issues.

This is not new for Jesus Christ himself led an unpopular life.

What is right will not always be easy.

As Christians we know that Man’s word and thoughts will not be how we are judged but if we lived by God’s commands.

When we follow what is popular, we are following the direction of Man’s Heart.

Here is what the Bible states about mankind’s heart that is left unguarded and not aligned with his teachings:

Mark 7:21-22- For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly.

Stand firm in your Faith in God and guard your heart against the things of this world.

For we spend but a moment on Earth among men but an eternity in Heaven or Hell. Where you spend eternity is your decision based on your freewill decisions.

If you wonder if a loving and compassionate God would commend anyone to Hell, he doesn’t.

God loves us so much that he gives us every opportunity to be with him. In fact he allowed his own son to die for our Sins. All we have to do is confess our sins and accept him into our hearts. (John 3:16)

Stay strong Christian friends in your values, morals, and beliefs. No matter what is popular, do what is right. Guard your heart and home. Pour into your Bible, prayers, and seeking God in these times.  Put on the Armor of God and the war around you will be won in his Holy name.  

                                                          Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

The Nexus 7 Giveaway Event hosted by Mom Powered Media

I've found another Giveaway to Bring to my Supporting Readers

The Nexus 7 Giveaway Event hosted by Mom Powered Media

Prize: Nexus 7 Tablet

The event dates: 8/16 – 9/6

Stay Tuned in August for more information on how you can WIN this great Prize !

If you win please let me know so I can cheer for you ! 

Bloggers Interested in Signing up for this Giveaway? Visit Mom Powered Media 

Please use me ( A Loving Lasting Marriage) as Who Referred You.

Upcoming Giveaway Stay Tuned :

I've found a Great Giveaway Opportunity for my readers !

Here are the Prizes that will be offered:

$50 Adorable Baby Clothing Gift Certificate

 2 $16 (up to) Products for Lilla Rose

• LeapFrog LeapsterGS Explorer

The event dates are : August 12 - August 31

If you are a Blogger and want to get in the fun of a FREE Giveaway visit the site who is hosting :

Health, Beauty, Children, and Family Giveaways

I hope that some of my readers snag these great prizes. I am sure that will be good additions to your Christmas stash ! 

I will have another post when the contest starts so you won't miss out on this great opportunity !

Stay Tuned ! 

Taking Time For Others

We are still settling in our new town. Apart of that settling in is making new friends. I joined a Mom's group here in our new town and we have been going to play dates .

Today's play date was a little different than meeting at the park. Today we had a chance to give back.

We went to the Midwest Food Bank. I  was amazed to find out it was only a short drive from our new home. 

We signed in and watch a short film that gave more information about the organization. 

I was surprised to find out the Midwest Food Bank was began and continues as a Faith Based initiative.

 It is amazing that we serve others with a drive none other to do good works for God how we can be blessed. 

This group began on a farm and now has grown into four large locations. Three of these are in Illinois and the newest location is in Georgia. In addition to giving to local organizations, Midwest Food Bank is also one of the largest suppliers of the Salvation Army when disasters hit such as Hurricane Katrina hit.

We were then able to take a tour of the Peoria Location :

And then my Son was able to help package Tender Mercies :

Although we were not able to stay long due to my 2 year olds short attention span I feel that every bit helps.  Teaching our children at a young age to give to others is a great life lesson to share with them. 

I plan to return to the Midwest Food Bank and giving more time to help others. I hope that there is some type of organization  in your area that you can give support to as well. 

Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

Love your Spouse as they grow....

Can you say to your spouse “ I will love you now and as you grow and develop into all that God intends”?

It is natural for people to change as we develop throughout life. Some of these changes are brought upon by the stage of life you are in. For example, parenthood brings about new priorities and a different view of what is important in life.

In addition, God has a plan for us all. God does not always show us this plan at all once. To achieve the destiny that God has in store for us often we have to learn or earn our stripes. To become that person we need to be for God we will have to grow. Not all stages of growth are easy or beautiful. Some of those stages may have rocky waters.

God placed you with your spouse to be a helpmate and to love your and support your spouse during their spiritual growth.

In my own marriage I have had to face some rocky waters. I learned a great life lesson. I prayed for patience and God tested me with a difficult situation. Now I know that all things come in due time. In addition, life is bigger than you. It is about all those who are around us. Improving and enriching others brings about our own personal growth as well.

If your spouse has changed think about events, situations, or reasons why this change has occurred. Put yourself in your spouse’s shoes to understand their perspective. Embrace new ideas and goals. Support your spouse with encouragement and most importantly prayer.

When my husband first decided to attend medical school we were still in college and engaged. I didn’t think he would get accepted, after all the chances are so slim. I thought we would teach, live in our home county forever, and just have a normal life.

His acceptance letter came one month before we said I do. Two years of living apart, my motto was: “One day at a Time.” I have to tell you each of those days felt like a year.

Now my motto is: “ I will stand beside you and encourage you no matter how long or how far it takes us”.

My husband encourages my dreams and goals as well. In my goal to become a better educator I am pursuing a Master’s.

We take turns lifting one another. He listens, helps me figure things out, and watches our son while I type research papers. When I feel like I want to give in he reassures me that I am capable of getting it done.

The path that your marriage may lead may not be where you expected to go. Be flexible for God has been flexible with you. Communicate with your spouse your feelings and I am sure that they will understand your concerns. In communicating you can gain a better understanding of your spouse’s adapted goals.

The most important thing in your marriage is that you are working together. No matter how big or small your goals are, working together will create a bond. Love your spouse, as they become all that God intends for them to be.

Marriage is  a labor of  love, it takes work, time, and commit to allow it to grow.   I hope you are able to use these insights to create and/or maintain your "Loving Lasting Marriage". In addition, Pray together and Seek God together if you are seeking your Loving Lasting Marriage.

Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

Let's Have a Good Laugh !

When is the last time you and your spouse had a good laugh together?  Laughing is one thing we love to do at our house. Even our 2 year old is in on “jokes”.  One type of joke that we use all the time is: “ I have some good news and I have some bad news”. And then we make up some ridiculous information.  

Another thing we do is laugh at each other. Yes, that’s right at each other.  If someone says something incorrectly that usually get a good laugh. Sometimes if another person gets mad, it usually ends up with both of us laughing so hard we are crying.

It may help that my husband was the class clown and one of the characteristics that drew me to him was his humor. We just love to laugh.

There are some great benefits to laughter. These benefits include physical, mental, and social benefits. You can find more about the benefits of laughing thru this site: Laughter is the Best Medicine.

Do you and your spouse laugh together?  According to “ Love, Laughter and marriage: Why Laughter is Vital to a Healthy Relationship”, here are 5 reason why you should:

1.     Laughter fosters a sense of playfulness

2.     Forges a positive bond

3.     Brings greater perspective

4.     Reduces defensiveness & opens you up to new experiences

5.     Acts as a buffer to stress (see benefits of laughing)

Connecting through laughter diminishes the time you focus on negative things in your marriage or just life in general.

Here you will find Bible Scriptures on Humor & Laughter . We serve an awesome God who knows what is good for us, for he made us in his own image. 

I hope that this week you and your Spouse can focus on the positive things in your life. Have a good laugh together and enjoy one another. 

Marriage is  a labor of  love, it takes work, time, and commit to allow it to grow.   I hope you are able to use these insights to create and/or maintain your "Loving Lasting Marriage". In addition, Pray together and Seek God together if you are seeking your Loving Lasting Marriage.

Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

Does society uplift divorce?

The media is usually a buzz when celebrities divorce. The readers learn all about the ups and downs of the marriage, the financial war, custody battles, and even “dirt” on the people involved.

The most recent celebrity divorce however had another component in the spotlight, religion.  Of course I am referencing to the recent divorce of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Scientology is said to be the main reason that Katie Holmes wanted to divorce her husband of five years.

 

Building your relationship with your future spouse, you should ensure that you are building upon a stable foundation. You should ensure that you and your future spouse have aligned values and religious views. Differing views of religion go far beyond attending weekly sessions at church. It will affect the way you live your life, most of all it can affect your walk with God.

Riding on the divorce train a new T.V. show also had three Ex-Wives of Celebrities.  These wives were sort of bragging that they were “once” married to these stars and each even gave a list of positive attributes of their ex-husband.

Hmm…

Most celebrities marry in hast, for fun, to prove a point, or just because.

Marriage is a Holy partnership instituted and ordained by God for the lifelong relationship between husband and wife.

Planning to marry should take deep thought, laying out your deal busters, and most importantly prayer.

Viewing social media displaying  divorce can be discouraging to those who are facing issues in their own marriage. It seems to be so widely accepted, easy, and gives you a fresh start. However, don’t let the pressure of the world affect your marriage and most importantly your faith. Divorce is not a fresh start. If you don’t handle the issues that lead you to divorce you can easily end up in a similar or worse situation with your next spouse.

If you are facing a time of distress in  your marriage, I would encourage you to seek martial support you’re a pastor or Christian counselor. Take time and make a promise to honestly face your marriage issues. You must be willing to compromise, and actually makes changes to ensure that both parties are happy.

Is any marriage perfect? No, life is not perfect. We are not perfect, but God never gave up on us. Therefore, we should not give up on our marriages.

Here is a  helpful reading :

·      How to Avoid Divorce by Dr. S. Cole


Book Suggestion :

Breaking the Cycle of Divorce: How Your Marriage Can Succeed Even if Your Parents' Didn'tBy: John Trent Ph.D. 

Marriage is  a labor of  love, it takes work, time, and commit to allow it to grow.   I hope you are able to use these insights to create and/or maintain your "Loving Lasting Marriage". In addition, Pray together and Seek God together if you are seeking your Loving Lasting Marriage.

Shalasha

You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, and Pintrest.

Like and Share  this blog if you find it encouraging . 

Dusting Out the Cobwebs !

I am thankful for my readers who have e-mailed; messaged, or left comments to inspire me to continue blogging about my passion to encourage successful marriages. I have decided to get back into the swing of blogging from not only your encouragement's but also to God's leading.

Here is a glimpse of what has been occurring in my family’s life:

My Husband Graduated Medical School (Glory to God)

 My Husband's Graduation from Brody School of Medicine at East Carolina University. 

We went on a Family Vacation

 Our 1st Cruise to the  Bahamas. 

We moved from NC to IL

Our New Home in Illinois. 

And we have been settling in into our new life.

 Our family at the firework show.

Although I have not been actively blogging the passion to help other’s achieve or maintain their Loving Lasting Marriage has not decreased. I have many plans to continue learning and ensuring that I will be able to give those who seek it Godly advice. 

I can't help but be reminded from that no matter how unimportant you may think a task is, if God gave you the directions to do it , it must be done. Obedience no matter how insufficient to you , is still obedience.  Of course this was shown to us in the scriptures of the events that happened to Jonah when he disobeyed God's commands.  Here is a overview of Jonah and The Whale, if you need a refresher or have not read the scriptures.  What has God moved you to do ?  If you are scared, unsure, or feel that it is something that you can not be successful, fear not ! For God will never leave or forsake you. In fact God will give you the armor to defeat your fears. 

I am Thankful for God's presence in my life. He has opened doors, provided, and most importantly his presence brings me peace. 

If you have not asked God to come into your life let's take this time right now. Let's invite Jesus Christ the Savior into your heart and home. 

Dear Lord Jesus:

I thank you for sacrificing your life on the cross for my sins to be forgiven. Please come into my heart right now, and wipe away all my sins. Grant me your free gift of Eternal Life. Fill me with your Holy Spirit to receive your power in my life. Help me to lead a life that is acceptable in your sight.

Amen.

I encourage you to surround yourself with other like minded Christians. To seek a holy ghost filled church that teaches from the word of God. Most importantly seek God in the word and prayer. I look forward to bringing my readers Godly Insights on Marriage.

Thank you all ! 

Shalasha